Can Relationships Harm Your Health?

February 05, 2017 / Health Coaching

There is one area of your life that will have more of an impact on your health than you probably realize. That area? Relationships. The relationships you have with your friends, spouse, your children, family, or even your coworkers can effect your health in so many ways. So much influence comes from the people you surround yourself with that it is important to be picky about who you spend your time with. There is a saying that you take on the traits of the 5 people you spend the most of your time with. So are your relationships helping or hurting your health?


Your significant other

The relationships in your life that you give your time and energy to are a huge influence on your health. Let’s start with a big one. Your significant other. Let’s just as an example say you and your significant other are not a good match. The two of you are constantly in battle and you just can’t seem to communicate.  The relationship is stressful and it is causing a lot of tension at home. This is a person you have chosen to put your love and support into and it’s not working. Panic sets in along with denial. We develop and transform our lives around people we care about most. Of course we all have moments when we have to put a little more effort into our relationships and work things through. However, the truth is they should not be a constant source of stress and tension for us. If you don’t feel good in your relationship at least once a day (not all day) but at least once a day then there is an issue. Trust me your health is going to pay for it.

People tend to pick up the habits and traits of their significant other. Like I mentioned before, you take on the traits of the people you spend the most time with. They also influence the decisions you make and play a big role in how you feel about yourself. Your friends, significant other, your children and family should make you feel good. You should feel support and love coming from them. They should mimic our goals and feeling with balance not resistance. We should never feel judgement or disdain from our relationships. If you are genuinely making an effort to spend time with someone and be your true self then they should embrace you not neglect you. If they do then it’s time to communicate how you are feeling or it’s time to let go.


Holding on to negative relationships

Holding onto negative relationship will only cause your health to suffer. Negative people project how they are feeling onto those around them. For example if someone lashes out at you and makes you feel less, then chances are they are severely laking in self-confidence and want you to feel the way they do. Another example could be blame; if someone is passing the blame onto you for something that is their fault chances are they are unwilling to accept their actions. Taking responsibility for your own feelings is important in a relationship. When I was studying to be a yoga instructor I was taught a very important lesson. You are responsible for how you feel. Feelings are a choice. It is okay to feel every emotion but it is not okay to blame others for your emotions. You need to own your emotions because like it or not they belong to you. Sometimes it is easier to let someone go who is not serving you and move on as hard as it might be. If you can’t strongly communicate with the people in your life then it can make maintaining your health a whole lot harder.


Influence and balance of relationships

Relationship should be about harmony and balance; not about being in a battle. Knowing that you genuinely want to see each other and have the same future goals is important.  You can not change others you can only change yourself. Setting a good example to others is the only way to spark the interest of change in them but they have to do the work themselves. People tend to pick up the habits and traits of their significant other. Like I mentioned before you take on the traits of the people you spend the most time with. For example; if you put in the effort to walk everyday or go to the gym then your partner or friends might join you to spend more time with you. The same concept could be used in the kitchen. Nothing brings people together faster than food. So your eating habits can also rub off on other people especially your significant other. If you spend time cooking at home and making healthy food then it will benefit both of you. So it is important to recognize if your healthy habits or not so healthy habits are being taken on by other people in your life.

So if you have fallen out of balance with your partner or friends it may be a sign to move on or communicate how you feel. If your friends or partners are unwilling to put in the work then that is a clear sign the universe wants you to put you energy on other people or things. You and your partner should support each other in health and harmony. If you feel loved and supported you will be more likely to return that love and support back to your partner. Feeling fulfilled and loved by the people in your life is so important, as human beings we do not like to feel isolated and lonely it tends to bring higher levels of stress and anxiety which can lead to very unhealthy sometimes life threatening habits. We could find ourselves developing bad habits that go along with constant stress like drinking, binge eating or even drug use; this is the opposite of what we want for our health.

Remember there will be stressful times in life but your friends and family should be there to help not harm. Your mind will give you every reason to stay or hold on to the wrong person but you know that deep down it is the healthier choice to let someone go who is not giving you what you need. It will hurt for a short time but it will be worth it not to spend a life time with the wrong people that are not supporting you or your health.